Drunken Double Date
by animeroxursox
Summary: Arthur, Alfred, Matthew, and Gilbert go on a double date, meet some fellow nations, get in trouble, and then get drunk! PruCan, UsUk, hint of Spamano. Human names used.


**I think that a PruCan/UsUk double date would be awesome, don't you?**

**I wanted the rights to Hetalia for Christmas, but sadly, I didn't get it D'X**

"Wait, you bloody wanker!" Arthur called after his boyfriend. Alfred had set them up on a double date with his brother Matthew and his boyfriend Gilbert.

"I'm not gonna be late because you're too slow!" Alfred called back.

"Why you little..." He yelled, running after Alfred.

When they got to Forest Park, Mathew and Gilbert were sitting on a park bench, waiting. Matthew's head was resting on Gilbert's shoulder.

"Well, you guys are early." Arthur said.

"Well, I would've been late, if it wasn't for my little Birdie!" Gilbert said, causing Matthew to blush a deep red.

"Yeah, Mattie is always early for everything!" Alfred said.

"Something he doesn't share with you!" Arthur muttered.

"What was that?"

"Nothing."

"Mmhmm."

"Alfie, where are we going!" Matthew said, pulling on his brother's sleeve. "It's really cold!"

"That's a secret!" Alfred and Gilbert chorused. Arthur was scared. Last time Gilbert had a surprise for him, he ended up standing on the top of a stolen Mercedes, (drunk, might I add) raising a makeshift flag and yelling "Hail Britannia! The great British Empire!" And, the car (Which Gilbert had been driving, coincidentally) happened to pass Alfred's house. He never lived that down.

"We borrowed one of Kiku's cars. It's a Honda Civic!" Alfred said.

"Oh thank God. I thought you would've borrowed one of Italy's cars. What happened to your cars?" Arthur said.

"I wanted to borrow one of his cars, since they're so kickass!" Gilbert said. "But Alfred convinced me to borrow one of his since you'd probably piss your pants at the awesome speeds of Italy's cars!"

"What the bloody hell is that supposed to mean, you wanker!"

"Hey guys, lets not spoil the date before it even starts!" Matthew said.

"I call shotgun!" Alfred said.

"But...I wanted to sit in the back with you!" Arthur said.

"Aw~ fine, anything for you, Artie!" he said, slipping his arm around his waist.

Arthur blushed. "Don't call me Artie!"

"You're so cute when you're blushing!"

Arthur blushed even more.

"Hey lovebirds, are we gonna get going or what?" Gilbert said.

"Let's go!" Alfred said, running towards the car.

~Hetalia~

"Why didn't I think we were going to a resturant?" Arthur said.

"Maybe you're losing your touch, old man!" Alfred said.

"Wanker!"

The quartet got out of the car.

"Welcome to Resturant L'Amerique!" Gilbert announced, with a large sweeping motion.

"The name is French for America." England said in a monotone. "Who picked it?"

"The awesome me did!" Gilbert said.

"And, I naturally agreed!" Alfred said.

"Do I even want to know why you picked this resturant?"

"I picked it 'cause Toni and Francis visit here, and they said it was good!"

"WHAT!" Alfred, Matthew, and Arthur yelled in unison. They all remembered when the trio was allied. Elizaveta still hasn't forgiven Gilbert for claiming Roderich's 'manly tract of land.' They were probably there right now, as they spoke.

"Um...are you sure about this Gil?" Matthew asked.

"Of course I am, Birdie!"

~Hetalia~

After they were seated, a waiter came up to them.

"What would you like to drink?" he asked.

"I'll have some Coke!" Alfred and Gilbert said.

"I'll just have some water." Arthur said. He didn't want to get drunk this time.

"Do you serve maple syrup?" Matthew asked.

The waiter stared at Matthew as if he was an extra-terrestrial. "Um..yes?"

"Kay, then can I have some please?"

The waiter scribbled something quickly on a notepad, and then walked away as quickly as possible, trying to keep his dignified look.

"Only you would order maple syrup to drink, Birdie." Gilbert said, putting an arm around Matthew.

Alfred leaned into Arthur. "Naturally, he _is_ my brother."

"Ohonhonhon, look at who we have hear. _Bonjour_,_ Angleterre_!" Francis said from behind Arthur.

_Oh great, _he's_ here_, he thought."Why are you here, you bloody frog."

"To see you, of course, _mon amis_."

"I am not your friend wanker!"

"You keep denying it, but everyone knows it's true!"

"Do you want to start another 100-Year-War!" Arthur said, his voice growing steadily louder.

"Toni!" Gilbert waved Antonio over while Francis and Arthur were bickering.

"Meet Matthew, my boyfriend." He lowered his voice. "He personificates Canada."

"_Hola_ Matthew!"

"Hi Antonio."

"Call me Toni!"

"Oi! Tomato bastard! Don't forget about me!" Another voice called. It had to be Lovino, of all people.

"_Ciao_, potato bastard."

"_Hallo_, Lovi!" Gilbert said cheerfully.

"Don't call me that, bastard!"

"Aw~, Lovi. Then why do you let me call you that?" Antonio said.

Lovino blushed. "I-I do not! Get off of me!" Lovino said, pushing off Antonio's arm.

"You know you love me, Lovi!" Antonio said. Lovino just started grumbling and stomped back to his table. "Lovi wait!" Antonio cried after Lovino.

"...Wow." was all Matthew could manage. He had heard of the Bad Touch Trio, but this was not what he expected.

"Kesesesese~! My friends are nearly as awesome as me, right?" Gilbert laughed.

Matthew didn't dignify that with a response.

"Um, guys. Francis challenged Arthur to a drinking challenge..." Alfred called out.

"Oh, count me in!" Gilbert said.

Matthew groaned. Those three were known for their actions when they were drunk. And there was a minibar in this resturant. Just great. "Did you know this resturant had a minibar?"

Alfred held up his hands. "I swear I didn't!"

Matthew sighed. "Lets go stop them!" By the time they got there, it was a bit late (for Arthur). He was chugging down abisinthe like it was nobody's buisness.

"Go Artie!" Alfred cheered, momentarily forgetting that they were here to _stop_ them, not encourage them.

"Alfie, we need to _stop_ him."

"Oh, right. Thanks Mattie."

Alfred marched over to Arthur, looped his arms under Arthur's, and dragged him away. "Bye Mattie. I'm taking him home."

Matthew waved goodbye. He looked at Gilbert, who wasn't as drunk as Arthur, but was still singing an offkey duet with Francis, disturbing many customers. He dragged Matthew off

"Hey-_hic_-why are you-_hic_-dragging me away."

"Because you're very clearly drunk."

"I'm on a UNICORN!" Arthur yelled out, galloping in a circle around Alfred. He stopped, pointed to an area near Alfred's head, and yelled, "Look, it's a fairy! A pretty green fairy!"

"That's it!" Alfred exclaimed. He picked up Arthur and carried him bridal style.

Arthur could feel Alfred's muscles through his t-shirt. "Your abs feel awesome~!"

Alfred stopped abruptly. _Did he just use the word awesome...?_, he thought. Alfred decided he could have fun with drunk Arthur. "Hey, have you ever skateboarded?" he asked, looking overly innocent.

~Hetalia~

Gilbert had ended up carrying _Matthew_ into the house instead. After plopping him on the bed, he tried to hug 'the fluffiest rug in the world.' Also known as Kumajirou.

"BIRDIE! The rug bit me!" Gilbert cried after Kumajirou scratched him on the nose.

"Kumakuma, be nice!" Matthew admonished his bear.

After putting a bandage on Gilbert's nose, Matthew tried (unsuccessfully) to drag Gilbert away from the kitchen, afraid he might blow it up. Gilbert sauntered into the kitchen, and found Gilbird, and some maple syrup. Poor Gilbird, the poor thing never recovered from becoming a 'feathery waffle covered with syrup.' Matthew just couldn't stop laughing when Gilbert realized that the so-called feathery waffle was his Gilbird the next morning.

~Hetalia~

It turns out Iggy was kickass at skateboarding. The thing is, he fell off every 30 seconds, but that had to be a record, since he was _smashed_. Alfred had recorded the whole thing on his phone.

"Hey~! The fairies don't like your shiny square thing! So put it away!" Arthur called out. Alfred assumed he was referring to his iPhone.

"Well your fairies to suck it, cuz Francis would pay big bucks for this footage!" Alfred said.

"But Alfie~!" Arthur said.

"Nope. I refuse!"

Arthur tried a different approach. "Alfie," Arthur purred, sending shivers down Alfred's back. "Won't you, for me?"

"U-uh, fine, but only for a little while!" Alfred gave in.

"Yay!" Arthur cheered as Alfred pocketed the iPhone.

"OK, so now we get some hamburgers!"

"Yay! I love hamburgers!"

"Wait...did you just say you _love_ hamburgers?"

Arthur giggled. "Of course I did, dummy! Now lets go!" He started pulling on Alfred's hand, but the nation wasn't paying attention. He was too busy thinking _My life's complete_.

"You know, I like you when you're drunk!" Alfred exclaimed, starting to walk in the direction of the nearest McDonald's.

~Hetalia~

` Matthew wasn't having that good of a time. Gilbert was wilder when he was drunk than when he was sober. Gilbert was chasing Gilbird around exclaiming "Come back waffle! The awesome me must eat you!" Gilbert then proceeded to trip on the rug, pulling it out from under the table, causing the table to topple over.

Gilbert giggled. "Oops!" he said before he threw up and passed out. Matthew sighed. He threw a blanket over Gilbert and placed a bottle of aspirin next to him.

"Good night Gilbert" Matthew said before leaving the living room for his warm, sober, fluffy bed.

~Hetalia~

Alfred dropped Arthur on the bed. After eating the hamburger, Arthur immediately threw up and passed out. He crawled up next to Arthur. "Good night Artie." he murmured before falling asleep.

**YAY! My wifi is being fixed at this moment, eheh.**

**Happy New Year!**

**Please leave a review!**

**Hasta la Pasta~!**


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